I really feel that The Lord has been putting “prayer” on my heart for sometime now. Seeking out the deeper, more meaningful purpose of prayer (besides just my waking & bedtime routine) has become a mission to me. I want to understand prayer through Gods eyes and how to pray in a way that it honors Him to the fullest.
I know that The Lord has been tugging on my heartstrings not just in an attempt to teach me more about the richness of prayer, but also to teach me about how to come in to communication with Him more deeply and with a sense of respect. I intend to share some of what I am learning with you & I hope that you too, will step out and seek to understand prayer better. I am learning that this daily communication is the single most important thing we can grasp and understand during our time on this Earth.
I know that I am not the only one who has the “prayer experiences” that I am going to share in this post & I hope my sharing encourages you in some way to take a closer look at your prayer life and how you are communicating with The Lord. It quite possibly could change the trajectory of your life and leave you with a sense of fulfillment and purpose unlike anything you’ve ever experienced.
I often find myself recounting memories of being a young girl of about 9 years old and enduring some abuse that left me feeling so saddened and in pain. I was too young to process it all but remember clearly feeling so confused & scared. I remember that my most favorite time of day was bedtime. I would get 8 hours of rest, away from the anxiety that plagued me daily.
I can remember it as if it were yesterday. I would climb into bed at night, curl up and pull the blanket over my head and just pray to Jesus. When the bible speaks of a “child like” faith, I know exactly what this is. I knew that Jesus was with me and that He cared. I literally remember His love was like a warm blanket surrounding me and bringing such surreal comfort in the midst of chaos.
Sometimes I was able to pray without crying. Other times, the tears would just flow. I prayed so deeply, openly and could literally feel Jesus sitting next to me it seemed. He was SO real, present and close. I felt His love and I knew He cared. I would drift to sleep as if He were rocking me in His arms.
I often look back at this time in my life and remember how well I was able to communicate with Jesus. I spoke to Him as I would a dear friend.
Somewhere along the way, I started to lose this connection in the form I had once experienced it.
With continued trials throughout my teens & early twenties, I found myself drifting further and further away from Him. Prayer became inconsistent (if I prayed at all). I became distracted, busy and rushed. I fought to overcome being a “product” of my environment and while I knew Jesus was very real, I didn’t give Him much of my life or my communication.
Part of me had a built a “wall” so high it shut out everyone including Christ. I didn’t want to get hurt and in the process I shut out The One who could help me through it all.
Fast forward to my late twenties, early thirties. I rededicated my life Christ in 2010 and began to come full circle back to Jesus. WOW. So amazing how much can happen in 5 years. The love I have experienced and the growth is astounding. I have also tripped big time and made some huge mistakes but in the midst of my mess, Christ was right there, hand extended.
In strengthening my relationship with The Lord, I have this “inner flame” burning that desires to please Him so.
I find myself becoming so sensitive to the Holy Spirit and His guidance in my life. In particular, I find that Christ has been putting “prayer” on my heart and mind so much. I have also felt the convictions (which were clearly confirmed in a book I am reading) of my faulty prayer habits.
For example, I was instantly convicted of my sometimes rushed prayers in the morning or at night. Often times at night I would find myself praying & then drifting off to sleep without completing my prayer. Most times, I was so busy “asking” for things that I didn’t allow The Lord to just speak to my heart. Other times, I would wake up and start my day without even as much as a “hello” or “thank you” for a new day.
The point is friends, I longed for this feeling I once had as a 9 year old scared little girl. While my little world spun out of control I was the most focused and in tune with what “prayer” really was about and I had conversations with Jesus that I would remember in my mid thirties.
I am reading a book that I can easily say is life changing in terms of prayer. A tiny little read, it is packed with some of the most eye opening profound thoughts you can imagine in terms of prayer. I know that Christ is speaking to me through this tiny little book that I found by happenstance. Here it is:
I am on a mission to become a prayer warrior. I want to talk to Jesus like I did as that 9 year old little girl and I want to HEAR from Him like I did then. I am in the habit of taking Jesus with me EVERYWHERE and everyday. I pray in the car, worship and keep Him in mind each day. However, I want to take it a step further (and I encourage you to). I want to show Christ that I am not just about “asking” things from Him but willing to listen. I want Him to open the eyes of my heart.
I often wonder how many blessings I have missed out on as a result of talking too much and not listening enough. I recently created a tiny space in my bedroom that is my dedicated prayer space. My own personal “War Room” if you will. A place free of distractions that allows me to come before The Lord, fully present.
I am practicing not just a “one sided” conversation with The Lord but LISTENING to what He wants to tell me as well. I am practicing ‘stillness’ which in and of itself, is a huge effort in our society.
The point is friends, you would never tolerate one sided conversations from people who do nothing but ask things of you or people who fall asleep while you are speaking to them! I am pretty certain Jesus feels this way when it comes to our conversation with Him.
I think that in our “hurried” little worlds we get lost in what does not matter and we forget the thing that matters most: true heartfelt prayer. Conversation with Jesus. I have made it my life’s purpose to become a prayer warrior and to learn how to talk to Christ in a way that is so rich, fulfilling and tangible. Much like I did when I was that little scared 9 year old girl.
I hope that this encourages you to re-evaluate your prayer life with Christ. Create a little space that you can go (free of distractions) and give The Lord the BEST of yourself. If you are confused or not sure how to pray, you can ASK Him. I believe that God honors the genuine prayers and our pleas for help and guidance. Also, invest in this little $8 book I mentioned above. It is so powerful and really offers a lot of “ah ha” concepts.
If you have any questions, ask. I love comments and am always here for you. In the meantime have a blessed rest of the week and thank you for allowing me to share a little of what has been placed on my heart.