Hello beautiful P31 Chicks!
I am particularly excited about today’s post. How to overcome your painful past and live an awesome abundant joy filled life! How amazing does that sound? Depending on where you are in your life it may be hard to believe that this is possible but I can assure you, it is. There was a time that I was busy just surviving through each day. I was left to pick up the pieces of my crazy life and there were times that I REACTED to things in my past (out of frustration!) only to further create more madness in my life.
Have you ever felt like that? Like everything you do just keeps knocking you down and you can’t get ahead? Pain can really work a number on us. A painful past has a way of sticking with us and before you know it we are formulating our thoughts, decisions and LIFE based around it! Ugh! This is about as terrible as it sounds and I assure you, this is NOT the way God designed for you to live life.
As it says in John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
I believe that if we slow down long enough to allow God to speak to us, we will find the answers to so many “unanswered” questions in our lives including those of our painful past. This is where we often find ourselves searching for meaning or asking where God was when “this or that” happened.
When you have survived a painful past it is very easy to feel angry, frustrated or vulnerable and many times want to blame God but trust me when I tell you, it was God that was there with you all along helping you to survive, only it is hard to see this when you are in the midst of the storm. This is usually because we are so busy trying to fix or control things ourselves that we don’t look to the answer that was there all along.
Here are some ways to overcome your painful past and live the life that God desires for you. Remember, He has great plans for you and He chose you to be here on Earth carrying out His desires and purpose for your life! This is a huge responsibility and it requires you to overcome those things that are trying to hold you back.
*Feelings: Understand that it is ok to feel frustrated, hurt or angry but it is not ok to act on it. Be open and honest and talk to God like you would talk to someone sitting next to you, after all, He is everywhere all of the time. Getting your emotions out is key to healing. A BIG part of the “survival” mentality is putting things away and compartmentalizing things. I did this all of the time in my past. I would become hardened and shut myself off to the world. All this does is hurt you. God wants you to be open with Him about what you are feeling. Then He can truly step in to help.
*Get Christ centered help: I think one of the BIGGEST mistakes we make is expecting our loved ones or spouse to fill a void in our lives and provide us the answers. I myself did this in my marriage. I took out my frustrations on my hubby at times and at others times I expected him to fill a void he was not capable of filling. It is important to understand that it is OK to ask for help. Seek out the help of a spiritual mentor, Pastor or Christian counselor to help you. It is important to have someone helping you on this journey who knows and believes Gods principles and firm foundation. For me, it was my Pastor in Tampa. She was an integral part in helping me to facilitate healing and learning Gods plan for my life. She taught me real practical applicable things based on Gods words and promises. This was the greatest (and at times hardest) two years of my life. I cried buckets but for each tear shed God healed a piece of my heart.
*You must face it to heal it: Hands down I can tell you this is the hardest part (and perhaps biggest reason) many do not ever achieve healing. It is easy to develop survival skills and live your life as if nothing happened. It is MUCH harder however to go back to those painful places and memories and face them. In my years of counseling with my Pastor, I shed buckets of tears and the pain was almost too much to bear at times but I survived because of Gods grace, love and mercy. For Him to do His greatest works in us it takes us realizing that we CANNOT do it on our own. We need His help and He won’t leave you nor forsake you. A part of healing is going back to those places and letting God remove the infection. It involves dredging up years of things you may have put away or forgotten but these are the things that we subconsciously hold onto that can end up destroying us. Again, I reference John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. God desires GREAT things for your life and He will never leave you for one second.
*Forgiveness: After you’ve opened up and let God in to those places He will point out to you exactly what to do and when to do it. This includes forgiveness. In my own personal journey I had to face my past head on and as God healed my heart He gave me the wisdom, knowledge and strength needed to forgive. I went back to people who hurt me and I gently confronted them with my feelings but also offered forgiveness. This was freedom for me. Through forgiving those who hurt me, God taught me that I would be free. He also taught me and reminded me of what Christ did on the Cross. Forgiveness is not an option, it is a commandment and God taught me this in the most gently loving way. God (and ONLY GOD!!) can tell you when, where and HOW to do this. It is a personal relationship between you and Him that makes all of the difference in the world and is the absolute most essential part to healing. Just take the steps and quiet your mind and spirit so that you can listen to His guidance.
*Prayer: God is your Father. Your mother, your loved one, your friend. He is everything to you. Though I do not know each of you who may be reading this blog, I do know this: God can fill the space for each incident that has happened in your life and each person that you may have lost along the way. If you grew up without your parents, God will be this for you. If you grew up without friends, God is your friend. Let Him in and talk to him. You can’t compartmentalize God or just bring Him into your life on Sundays. We are designed to LIVE FOR God. When you think of this and really focus on this… everything makes sense. Prayer to Him is a form of worship and communication. Think about this. How can you get anywhere in life without communicating? It would be very hard if not impossible! Same with God. He is with you ALL of the time! Each second of each minute of each day. Start to talk to Him daily through prayer and listen for His answers. Then and only then can He provide direction.
As you go through this healing journey in your life you will start to see things SO differently! Things that once ached your heart will ache your heart no more. You will start to live a FREEDOM filled, joy filled, ABUNDANT life! You will understand that joy is not contingent on your possessions but rather on what God imparts into your heart.
I praise God for each and every thing in my life because without it, I truly would not be who He designed me to be. The same goes for you. I encourage you to go through this journey and face your past. Let God heal your heart so that you can do ALL of the fantastic things God has planned for you to do!
Until later P31 Chicks.