Stop blaming and start living!


I just love this! I thought long and hard about my post for today and this just resonated with me. I want to encourage you today to really reflect on your life and where you are. Do you know that where you are right now is a direct result of a decision you’ve made? We ALL have the power of choice and one of THE greatest things that wreaks havoc on people is their inability to accept personal responsibility for where they are. Please, do not get me wrong, BAD things happen to good people, yes, but allowing these things to consume your life and continuing the “blame game” only hurts you. Today, I want to encourage you to step out of the box and really evaluate your life and your thought processes. Are you getting caught up in the blame game? If so, it’s ok, but I am hoping through this post you will be challenged to step up and make some different choices and thoughts about your one life. Remember, we only get ONE life!

I know firsthand what it means to overcome. I have been hurt enough times in my life to write a book (heck, I AM writing a book!) but I will not be focusing on the pain and emotional turmoil I endured. Who wants to read that? Quite depressing! Rather, I am focusing on the lessons I learned through these times. You see, it is important to understand that your God is SO much bigger than all of this mess! Through your most treacherous times, the Lord is busy crafting His blessings for your life. He will give you wisdom, knowledge and peace to overcome. Even more importantly, He will give you understanding.

Do you know what it means to understand? It means that you can change the course of your life and the life of your family. You are no longer held in bondage and chains because the Lord sets you FREE  from this. He allows you to take a different path. He allows you to stop finger-pointing and blaming. At some point, you grow up and realize that YOU alone are responsible for your life and through His grace and mercy you WILL THRIVE!

I know people who are caught up in the blame game and I think this hurts them much more than the pain they endured. Think of it like this, blaming is like allowing someone to have control over your life forever. These people who hurt us and their actions have the ability to take over your WHOLE life if you continue blaming! Who has the right to take your life away??

By YOU continuing to make excuses for not doing things differently, you indirectly allow your abusers to continue to have control over your whole life…. even when they may no longer be in it! How insanely crazy is this!?!?

This may seem harsh, I know but I am speaking as a former “survivor”… I was a survivor but I started to be molded into a “victim” mentality until I realized through the grace of God that this was satans grip on my life!  I do not know about you but I refuse to allow satan to have any piece of my life or worse yet, I refuse to let him steal the blessings God has for my life! NEVER!

I am also so tired of hearing people say “Where was God when this or that happened?” Has it ever occurred to you that through His grace you are still here?? You’ve been given a second chance if you are breathing yet, we take these second chances and blow them on blaming, blaming and more blaming! Because of the stripes that Christ took on the cross YOU are blessed with a second chance! Take it, savor it and be thankful for it.

God doesn’t do these bad things to us! We do them to each other and ourselves. We allow negativity, slander, gossip and BLAMING to pull the wool over our eyes instead of opening them to His promises! I have been there and today, I realize it was His supernatural power and love that got me through some of the worst times in my life. It was His wisdom that spoke to my heart (even when I did not know what it was) and enabled me to make some of THE most important decisions of my life. It was His GRACE friends. Gods GRACE is sufficient for ALL of us!

God is there through your worst! He loves you and wants to see you walk in the blessings He has for you. Are you busy blaming your life away?? This is a tough question and quite honestly, I am shooting very straight with you today. If you are still breathing, it is not too late.

At some point, despite ALL of the terrible things that may have happened, we must step up and take personal ownership and responsibility. We must tap into the love, resources and gifts that God has readily available to us and then we must proceed to make a BETTER way for ourselves.

If you are not living in His fullness for your life, at some point, you must realize YOU have some choices to make. I went from surviving to thriving. I endured physical, mental and sexual abuse all before I was 18. I faced feelings of self-doubt, abandonment and heart wrenching PAIN at times in my life. If I continued to keep my eyes focused on THIS instead of all that Gods says …. I have NO idea where I would be.

Today, I encourage you, take control of your life by taking control of your choices and start with the choice to stop blaming. You have it in you to walk in the fullness of the Lord but as long as you are looking down, you can’t see all of the beauty He has waiting for you and your life.

Put your hands in your pockets and stop “pointing” today unless you are going to turn that finger towards yourself. YOU my friend hold the key that unlocks FREEDOM. In Christ, you are FREE. Any other way is only chains, bondage and pain. Which one do you choose?

Blessings and freedom to you,

Ashley Poptodorova

6 thoughts on “Stop blaming and start living!

  1. spiritministries says:

    Blessings Ashley,

    Wow! All I can say about that is, “Stand up and Praise the Lord!” I can relate with everything you have said here. I’ve been there and done that, then one day God revealed Himself to me. Hallelujah! This is raw and real, I admire your boldness and courage God has given you to speak out like this. He will bless you for this girl, many need to hear it no matter how hard it is. Keep up the good work girl. Many blessings to you.

    • Ashley Poptodorova says:

      Hi there! 😉
      Thank you! I appreciate your kind words so much! The biggest blessings in my life spawned from such hurtful things. As long as we are willing to take authority, learn the lessons and keep a grateful heart, we will always be OK!
      I am so happy to read your story of triumph and of overcoming as well! God is using you in a BIG way to spread His much needed message. To get to those who need to know the Lord, we need to “relate”… having endured some of the things you and I (and many others) have… we CAN relate!
      Have a blessed day,

  2. memkoh says:

    Beautiful post!
    Let me tell you how I came across your blog…I was replying one of my readers when the words “stop blaming and start living” came into my head. Before I typed it, I did a Google search to see if that phrase had been used before or if it was my original phrase (jokes on me!) and found your article with the same title. I finished up my reply with the phrase then came back to read this. I’m glad I did.

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